he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
