I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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