The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I'm like, not good at living.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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