I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
