Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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