marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize