Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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