Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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