so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
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I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
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I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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