and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize