okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
