yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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