Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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