i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Dating After Heartbreak
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
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While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!