I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything