but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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