do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
