and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
