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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
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