Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Enjoy the penises
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
