a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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