There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
There r osticjed everywhere
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Randomize
