I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I'm getting married
To pizza
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Randomize
