Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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