I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
