Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
