Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets