apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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