Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Randomize
