well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
