Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
