Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Randomize
