The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Ketchup is God's man juice
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
