He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
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it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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