Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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