Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i just sent this text using only my big toe
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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