Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
You smell like stripper and shame
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
