I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
