she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
