yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
