I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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