I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
