So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
True strength comes from lack of pants
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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