I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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