Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
