Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
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