She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize