she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
