so explain again why im purple
no
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
