My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize