we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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